A good pair of jeans is hard to find. Too short, too long, too tight, too big. Not to mention the dreaded muffin top. You know what I mean—it’s when your love handles flow over the waistband of your jeans. Don’t be embarrassed, it happens to the best of us.
Recently, I saw a girl in her 20s who presented me with another common problem: back pockets that went from the middle of her butt to the top of her thighs. I shuddered. It flattened out her butt and made her look like she was trying to squeeze something between her butt cheeks. I think they might have been her boyfriend’s painting jeans.
Anyhow, the most important thing to remember when looking for a good pair of jeans is don’t follow the trend. Jeans are supposed to hug in all the right places on your body, not the mannequin in the window. For example, over the past year we saw the re-emergence of skinny jeans. If you’re lower torso and legs aren’t relatively straight to begin with, these jeans will just make you look like mom in those straight leg jeans you have been begging her to throw out.
The perfect pair of jeans should be an essential in every woman’s wardrobe, but can prove to be the most difficult to find.
To help you, let me address the first issue. Muffin top. Believe it or not, this issue is easily solved. Never buy a pair of jeans with a zipper only two inches long! Low riders or hip huggers are usually the culprit in this case. But, this doesn’t mean you have to go around like grandma with the button on your jeans reaching the button on your belly. Look for something with a mid-rise. By having the jeans sit low on your waist rather than around your hips, it keeps your love handles in check and inside your jeans.
For women fighting the belly bulge, again, look for mid-rise jeans. Go for a boot-cut style to even out your bodyline, and something with square front pockets can give the appearance of a flatter tummy.
Women with bigger bums probably have the most trouble finding a good pair of jeans. Jeans aren’t made specifically for bigger behinds, so if they fit well in the butt, make sure they aren’t too big in the crotch. Shimmy yourself into a pair with smaller, angled back pockets and a wider waistband. Don’t go for jeans with embellishments or embroidery, it will only draw attention to your rear when what you want to do is camouflage it.
If you’re dealing with the opposite problem and have nothing to fill out the seat of your jeans, try flap pockets or a pair with pockets a little higher on the bum.
As for length, I’m perfectly well aware of how hard it is for tall women to find jeans that fit. Most regular jeans have an inseam around 31 or 32 inches, when it’s a 33 or 34 you want. The extra inch or so makes a world of difference. A length stopping at the base of your heel is all you need.
Quite the opposite are petite women. You can always have your jeans hemmed up, but stay away from flared jeans. They will make you look shorter and can ruin their shape if you have them hemmed. Cuffed hems are a bad idea as well, as it takes away from the length of your legs. With any pair of jeans, wear them four or five times before you wash them. They will take the shape of your body and fit much better after they’re washed. Also, if you want a pair with a little stretch, try to look for something with just one or two per cent Lycra. Too much stretch will get saggy in the bum and thigh and big around the waist. You want your jeans to fit, not float.
DON’T DO IT: Too-low jeans with too-high thongs. No one likes plumber’s butt.